Connect with us

Hi, what are you looking for?

Satire

Pfizer Claims Vaccine Will Reduce Average Daily Child COVID Deaths From Almost Zero To Almost Zero

Babylon Bee illustration

BabylonBee.com

NEW YORK, NY—In a moment celebrated by all hard-working lobbyists, Pfizer announced that the COVID-19 vaccine will reduce average daily child COVID deaths from almost zero all the way down to almost zero.

“These are phenomenal results. Our internal studies have proven a microscopic benefit to an even more microscopic risk to children,” stated Dee Pimbly, head of Pfizer’s Department of Propaganda to a crowd of journalists who have not allowed their own children to bask in the warm glow of sunlight, or interact with other children for almost no reason whatsoever.

Click the link below to read the rest of this story.

https://babylonbee.com/news/pfizer-claims-vaccine-will-reduce-average-daily-child-covid-deaths-from-almost-zero-to-almost-zero

Click here to get more news from the Bulldog

On the go, but don’t want to miss any Bulldog news? Go to the App Store and downloads apps for Bulldog Reports and The Bulldog Show to your Apple and Android mobile devices. It’s free!

Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You May Also Like

National News

By Mark Hansel Bulldog Report managing editor The inaugural Freedom Fest in Morning View, Kentucky, drew a crowd of thousands to the farm of...

Health

Letter from St. E doctors and other healthcare professionals expresses strong opposition to mandate Deters law has received a copy of a letter from...

Business

Watch: Video of walkout at GE Evendale plant in Cincinnati, courtesy of Bulldog Media HANNAH BLEAU Breitbart Dozens of General Electric (GE) employees walked...

Health

Deters Law has issued the following release regarding a lawsuit filed against major healthcare systems in the Greater Cincinnati Region. The lawsuit addresses the...